Upcoming stays

You will discover that this page will change as often as the lies of a psychopath.  Not that we erm share much in common.  To hoteliers, I am the devil, so often do I trouble them with my frequent changes.  If every time I changed my mind, a kitten died, you would be guaranteed that dogs would have to find a new enemy.  If this list is not updated at least twice a week, it means I am dead or held captive.  Please send help.

September

  • Bulgari Rome
  • Hotel Il Pellicano
  • Mandarin Oriental Costa Navarino

November

  • Peninsula London
  • Raffles London
  • Mandarin Oriental Mayfair

December

  • Thanda Island
  • Waldorf Astoria Maldives
  • Velaa

January 2024

  • Jao
  • Mombo
  • Waterside

April 2024

  • Cheval Blanc St Barths
  • Eden Rock St Barths
  • Le Barthelemy
  • Malliouhana
  • Cap Juluca Anguilla

May 2024

  • Danai
  • One&Only Aesthesis
  • One&Only Kea Island
  • Passalacqua

October / November 2024

  • Arijiju
  • Singita Kataza House
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32 Responses

  1. I see you are going to Pikaia in December. Hubby and I went to Royal Palm in January 2017. I get claustrophobia and didn’t want to get trapped on a boat for a week. We did see Pikaia from afar and it looked lovely. Royal Palm was probably lovely it’s first two years, then the dampness got to it. It is no where near 5 stars any longer.
    Pikaia has it’s own boat, which is nice Royal Palm shared it’s boat, and we had long rides to get to the islands to see animals. Also the non cruise ship visitors only got to visit the islands during the heat of the day. I would be interested in how Pikaia deals with this.
    We also want to go to Patagonia again, we have stayed in fishing lodges, but do want to see Torres del Paine, looking forward to those reports.
    Why aren’t you going to Easter Island on that trip? It’s only five hours from Santiago! Ha Ha!

  2. Your South America trip looks amazing! So looking forward to your thoughts on Awasi Patagonia, in particular.
    Are you going to visit Mashpi Lodge while in Ecuador?
    And Iceland is one of my favourite places on earth.

  3. Loved: Amangiri
    Liked: Four Seasons Lion Palace, St. Petersburg
    Liked: King David Jerusalem
    Liked: Kempinski Vilnius
    Was Fine With: Four Seasons Moscow
    Was Fine With: David Citadel Jerusalem (Have had better stays there)
    Disliked: Aman Sveti Stefan (horrific service)
    Disliked: St. Regis New York
    Still Having Nightmares From: Crowne Plaza Minsk

    Hated:

  4. Hello Tom,
    I’m looking forward to read your next reviews.
    Btw, as i’m looking again your upcoming stays, you can’t miss la Bastide de Gordes ! Believe me 😉
    Have fun

  5. If you are heading back to India (and Rathambore), perhaps you can fit in a few days at Tadoba Andhari Tiger Reserve in Maharashtra province (central India). It’s a short flight from Delhi to Nagpur. I stayed at The Bamboo Forest Safari Lodge and thought it was outstanding – great accommodation, location, service and the guiding was exceptional. You can request a private naturalist guide (ask for Akshay – also lodge manager) and a private customized open jeep with bucket seats – very comfortable. This was my first tiger stop (went on to Kanha and Bandavgarh afterwards) and I loved it! Had some of my best tiger sightings in Tadoba including Matkasur vs Sloth Bear – truly epic! Tadoba is also a very beautiful reserve with varying terrains. Bamboo Forest Safari Lodge provide seemless airport transfers – trip to lodge takes about 4 hours. I think you can find a connecting flight from Nagpur to Varanasi. (If you contact them you will be emailing with Akshay – do mention my name, and hopefully it works out for tiger permits for Jan/Feb period this year.)

  6. Whilst you’re in Provence– check out Crillon le Brave; I love it. We usually do Provence-St. Tropez- Antibes (Hotel du Cap). Love Bastide de Gordes (and May is the perfect time). If you need another stop, Le Mirande in Avignon is very charming for a night.

    1. Thanks, Lindsay. Every trip we ever take ends up longer than expected, so I’ve been told to dial it down this year. (That means I’ll have to be sneak it in and hope she doesn’t notice).

  7. Quiet fan here, but have to chime in. If you have the time to add in post-Ravello, Villa Treville is hands down the best on the Amalfi Coast. The destination feels overpriced overall, but Treville has a wow factor the others are lacking.

    1. Julie – completely agree – I just hopped around the amalfi coast this summer – you can view my travels at @missmuffysmom – stayed at Palazzo Avino, JK Capri and then Villa TreVille and VTV took the cake in a big way. All of the other hotels we stayed at and hotels we explored while dining at were lacking many of the things we are used to during our travels. Glad you loved VTV too! It’s a truly magical spot. Happy New Year!

  8. I would think twice about Schloss Elmau. It is not Switzerland or even close. I was disappointed at my stay at the retreat there. Rooms ok. Food ok. Lots of kids in the main hotel. Service mediocre. Spa kinda strange. Price high for the experience. There were no concerts while I was there so maybe that makes it better. They have been doing lots of marketing and getting on people’s radar. But it is marketing not reality. I would stay almost anywhere in the Italian or Swiss mountains rather than there.

    1. Hey Tom, curious how you decided on Arijiju over Serai House or Lenguishu? There’s truly a lack of information on the three properties. Did you find Arijiju or Serai negotiable on price?

      1. Given the choice between modern or rustic, I will pick modern every time, so Arijiju was the clear winner. Also the spa facilities look great, I met their sales rep (back in a time when face-to-face meetings were allowed) and was sold on it immediately. And then Dorsia has sent clients there and they absolutely loved it.

        Even though it’s only for 2 of us staying, I did not try and negotiate on price as the industry is on its knees and I didn’t wanna be the one that toppled it over. Well, ok, that would be an interesting claim to fame.

  9. I guess South Africa was put on hold in November but I really hope you get to visit these lodges soon.
    Been to Tswalu last year and it was pretty close to perfection. Might also be due to the amazing wildlife we saw, but surely that wasn’t the only thing that was right.
    Also had a long and interesting conversation this year with the owner of Cheetah plains. He’s a true hospitality veteran with a clear vision of what he wants to offer his guests. Unfortunately also didn’t make it there anymore due to this pandemic but hope to visit it soon. If you beat me to it I would love to know if it is worth the effort and time.
    Surprised not to see the Royal Malewane on the list. I know you’re not a huge fan of The Royal Portfolio but I do believe you could be in for a treat. Then again, you’ve done the Farmstead already so there’s not much more to top that, unless you would hire the complete Africa house just for the fun of it. I liked the Africa house though as a couple (or parents with a youngster) I would take the Royal Malewane anyday. Their spa and breakfast are without a doubt my favorite among all the safari lodges I’ve visited.

  10. Hi! Awesome blog — first time reading a travel blog got me cry laughing ( or maybe its too much social distancing?)
    Curious on your upcoming trip to Lily of The Valley. Was on my list to go but after too many ” smoke in your fas” reviews, opted for La Réserve Ramatuelle.
    Check out Royal Champagne Hotel & Spa in Champillon — lovely escape in September!

    1. I’ve been to Royal Champagne in 2019 and La Reserve Ramatuelle twice. Both good properties, but we fancied somewhere new. We do also have a 3 month old daughter to now consider, so chances are we’ll just look at pictures of it instead and stay on the sofa.

  11. Hi mate,
    Congrats on daughter no.2 !!
    I’m looking forwards to your thoughts on Maybourne Riviera, any updates on Kisawa ?

  12. I know this has been discussed, but, I just got here,so here’s my plea to you…get to the Caribbean and Central America!
    I would love your perspective on the resorts on this side of the hemisphere…where I reside. Getting to the Maldives and Asia are not as easy during the past couple of years, but, getting things lined up for Cheval Balanc / Jaoli in maldives for next year. I have to juggle teenager schedule…don’t scoff at this as you will see years down the road.
    However, for now we have been jumping across the Caribbean, South America and Mexico. I see you plan on Aman New York…maybe tie the south with it…St Barth’s, St. Lucia, Brandon’s new digs for example. Your perspective would be most welcoming. Don’t let your experience with Las Ventanas define/sour your appetite to venture in the Mexican region.

  13. May I make your decisions a little messier. If not yet experienced, I would recommend the FS Cap Ferrat. Definitely one of a kind. Gleneagles a bit further up in the country of rain, but it is one of a kind, so I would recommend to check their website to see. Think “muddy boots, tuxedo jackets, and pretending to be a astronaut Iceland sir”, but with the necessary price tag.

  14. I am so excited about your staying at Peninsula London Nov 2023 – I want to go – but will wait for your review to read everything honest about it all! So love your blog.

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  • Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
  • A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
  • As upgrades go, this four-bedroom ocean villa @amanyara_resort we stayed in last week was certainly one of my better ones. I was ill and passed out for most of the stay, so will have to go back again to truly experience it. Five bedroom next time, please and thank you.
  • With our upcoming trip to Turks and Caicos, I’m reminded how bad I am at this Instagram malarkey.  I’ve not even posted of our last trip to the Caribbean, from March, so with all the enthusiasm of someone sat on the electric chair here’s @jumbybayresort
  • Little Dix might sound like a sub-genre on Pornhub but it’s actually a beautiful resort in the British Virgin Islands. You learn something new every day.
  • If you ignore the service, food and anything at all related to the humans, Necker Island is a majestic place worth visiting.
  • With three hot tubs on the Branson Estate on Moskito Island, it’s really helped turn my two year old into a well rounded individual who now expects it as a minimum.
  • It’s a lion eat lion world @lengishu.house
  • Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
Hotel Il Pellicano a Leading Hotel of the World. And let me tell you how it’s a leader in many areas, like incompetence. My review is live @hotelilpellicano
2 days ago
View on Instagram |
1/9
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
A few months after opening (with Dorsia clients being their first ever guests) I decided to check out Bulgari Rome. Fortunately, they have moved away from the copy/paste formula of Milan to London to Paris and created something much more…Italian. Unfortunately that means I can’t copy/paste my Paris write-up. The review will be out next Friday. @bulgarihotels
2 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
2/9
As upgrades go, this four-bedroom ocean villa @amanyara_resort we stayed in last week was certainly one of my better ones. I was ill and passed out for most of the stay, so will have to go back again to truly experience it. Five bedroom next time, please and thank you.
As upgrades go, this four-bedroom ocean villa @amanyara_resort we stayed in last week was certainly one of my better ones. I was ill and passed out for most of the stay, so will have to go back again to truly experience it. Five bedroom next time, please and thank you.
As upgrades go, this four-bedroom ocean villa @amanyara_resort we stayed in last week was certainly one of my better ones. I was ill and passed out for most of the stay, so will have to go back again to truly experience it. Five bedroom next time, please and thank you.
3 months ago
View on Instagram |
3/9
With our upcoming trip to Turks and Caicos, I’m reminded how bad I am at this Instagram malarkey.  I’ve not even posted of our last trip to the Caribbean, from March, so with all the enthusiasm of someone sat on the electric chair here’s @jumbybayresort
With our upcoming trip to Turks and Caicos, I’m reminded how bad I am at this Instagram malarkey. I’ve not even posted of our last trip to the Caribbean, from March, so with all the enthusiasm of someone sat on the electric chair here’s @jumbybayresort
3 months ago
View on Instagram |
4/9
Little Dix might sound like a sub-genre on Pornhub but it’s actually a beautiful resort in the British Virgin Islands. You learn something new every day.
Little Dix might sound like a sub-genre on Pornhub but it’s actually a beautiful resort in the British Virgin Islands. You learn something new every day.
Little Dix might sound like a sub-genre on Pornhub but it’s actually a beautiful resort in the British Virgin Islands. You learn something new every day.
Little Dix might sound like a sub-genre on Pornhub but it’s actually a beautiful resort in the British Virgin Islands. You learn something new every day.
5 months ago
View on Instagram |
5/9
If you ignore the service, food and anything at all related to the humans, Necker Island is a majestic place worth visiting.
If you ignore the service, food and anything at all related to the humans, Necker Island is a majestic place worth visiting.
If you ignore the service, food and anything at all related to the humans, Necker Island is a majestic place worth visiting.
If you ignore the service, food and anything at all related to the humans, Necker Island is a majestic place worth visiting.
If you ignore the service, food and anything at all related to the humans, Necker Island is a majestic place worth visiting.
If you ignore the service, food and anything at all related to the humans, Necker Island is a majestic place worth visiting.
If you ignore the service, food and anything at all related to the humans, Necker Island is a majestic place worth visiting.
If you ignore the service, food and anything at all related to the humans, Necker Island is a majestic place worth visiting.
5 months ago
View on Instagram |
6/9
With three hot tubs on the Branson Estate on Moskito Island, it’s really helped turn my two year old into a well rounded individual who now expects it as a minimum.
With three hot tubs on the Branson Estate on Moskito Island, it’s really helped turn my two year old into a well rounded individual who now expects it as a minimum.
With three hot tubs on the Branson Estate on Moskito Island, it’s really helped turn my two year old into a well rounded individual who now expects it as a minimum.
With three hot tubs on the Branson Estate on Moskito Island, it’s really helped turn my two year old into a well rounded individual who now expects it as a minimum.
With three hot tubs on the Branson Estate on Moskito Island, it’s really helped turn my two year old into a well rounded individual who now expects it as a minimum.
With three hot tubs on the Branson Estate on Moskito Island, it’s really helped turn my two year old into a well rounded individual who now expects it as a minimum.
5 months ago
View on Instagram |
7/9
It’s a lion eat lion world @lengishu.house
It’s a lion eat lion world @lengishu.house
It’s a lion eat lion world @lengishu.house
It’s a lion eat lion world @lengishu.house
It’s a lion eat lion world @lengishu.house
It’s a lion eat lion world @lengishu.house
7 months ago
View on Instagram |
8/9
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
Describing @oljogi is tough. It’s 50% incredible and 51% insane. You can’t argue with maths.
7 months ago
View on Instagram |
9/9

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